Saturday, April 20

Canadian Roadway Puddle Pilot Veers Through Standing Water, Purposely Soaking Pedestrians


Human beings are capable of awe-inspiring things. The air we breathe is 79% nitrogen and we’re capable of breathing that air into brilliantly complex ideas and functions, making the world an extraordinary place. This is not a story about inhaling air and exhaling excellence. This is a story of doing something ridiculous, getting caught on camera, and dealing with the swift and severe repercussions.

In yet another display of ill-conceived ideations, our species is continuing to show that we are capable of such idiocy that we take pause to consider our cognitive superiority. Let’s go to Canada.

In the northeast United States, it rained a lot recently. One Canadian man, driving a utility van down the streets of Ottowa, was purposely driving through standing water on the roadside in order to decimate pedestrians with water. Rude.

As justice would have it, the car in front of the puddle bound van splasher caught the mean-spirited act on film with a rear-facing window camera. The footage clearly shows the van consciously veering into large roadside puddles when pedestrians are close and covering them with water. Fortunately, no one was injured. The van driver, however, had yet to pay the pied piper.

The video from the car in front of the van went viral, being watched over 750,000 times, and the van was discovered to belong to a local contracting company called Black and McDonald Limited. As swift as viral media can be, the driver was found and thoroughly soaked.

“We apologize to everyone impacted by the recent incident in Ottawa of unacceptable driving by one of our van drivers. We want to reassure the public that safety is our #1 priority. This is an isolated incident and the individual is no longer employed with Black and McDonald,” they released in a tweet.

Because of the reckless behavior, authorities are looking into the incident to determine the intent to purposely put people in danger. Because of the company’s reaction, Ottowa Police applauded their timely and decisive response.

Justice, it would seem, is a dish best served wet.

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